Wednesday, January 6, 2016

My learnings and the NOW me

My Leanings...

Dealing with utmost painful events like a loved ones death, makes you realize how fragile life is and how important it is to live every moment. 

Here are some learnings of my past most gruelling 10 months.

Mantra- Don't resent, don't hate and don't curse anyone. If you do, you are giving them rent free accommodation in your body and an invitation to illnesses. 

Life isn't fair, nobody said it would be, so deal with it.  There is nothing personal in whatever people do to you. Its their and your journey. So drop the baggage. Forgive them without an apology, and move on.

Here is a list that I have derived from the most painful months of dealing with death.

1. There is nothing bigger than Life, if you have one rest all can be dealt with.

2. People in your life are not accidental. They are here for a purpose. Some people come in life as blessings and others come as lessons. They both are equally important.

3. Difficult situations remain till the time it teaches you what you are supposed to learn. So surrender to it.
4. Everything that you buy or get here including your precious I, me and myself has to be left behind when you go. 

5. Money is important and it can't buy you everything but you can't be happy without it either. Nevertheless that too becomes inconsequential in due course of time.

6. Watch sunrise everyday...especially when everything is falling around you. It rejuvenates you.

7. Hate is  a big word. Use it carefully.

8. Drinking and smoking are as dangerous to body as mindless shopping and other indulgences are to mind

9. Live beyond yourself. You will see how many lives you can change.

10. The only person you should compete is with yourself. Nobody else matters.

11. Help comes. Should you ever need it, ask for it. You will get it.

12. Life doesn't stop without anyone or for anyone. It continues. 

13. Cherish and nurture your family and friends. I am sure, I did something right in my life that I had such wonderful people who stood by me in the most harrowing phase of my life.

14. Be grateful for everything that you have in life.

Tuesday, January 5, 2016


It was first day of January of 2016. I was at the bus stop to drop a friend off. It was almost 2 pm and there was no sight of the bus. I saw a familiar lashing sound along with the drum beats. I saw a  Potraj mother and child passing by the shops.The child, smeared in turmeric and kumkum, wearing colorful rags was whipping himself. His mother, with another baby on her back, was beating a small dhol.
The child, who was barely 6 or 7 years old came to ask me money after it finished the regular whipping show. I asked him if it hurts and he smiled back saying a big"No". I  have always wondered how whipping with such intensity doesn't hurt and why must one resort to such torture to get alms. India has some strange customs like Devdasi, Potraj which are regressive. I normally wouldn't give money but this time I did. I dug into my bag and gave him a 10 rupee note. The child's face broke into a super lovely smile. He took the note, took to his lips and did a lovely flying kiss with it and that too with such ecstasy that I was completely unprepared for. No beggar ever, ever has done this . Me and my friend, both burst out laughing at his cheeky cuteness.That smile and that gesture stayed with us through the day.

Thank you, child, wherever you are for making my day special. I am grateful to you!

Note: The Potraj are a fast vanishing tribe that hail from the Western state of Maharashtra. They are worshipers of a goddess that is referred to as ‘Kadak Lakshmi’.
The Potraj are nomads who get alms for displaying what must be an extremely grueling profession. The women balance a small platform with their deity perched on their heads and play a drum to a foot-tapping beat while the men dance, twirl and smack themselves with heavy whips made out of woven coir or leather. The whips may weigh in the region of 10 kg (22 lbs) each and are knotted for added measure and land on the backs of these performers with a resounding ‘thwack’. Children are thrust into this profession at a very early age so that they may grow up and be able to bear the crack of the whip on their backs. Young boys may start as early as the age of six with lighter whips till they reach puberty and their teens and graduate to the heavier ones. Apart from the gruelling treks between cities, nights spent exposed to the elements, unrelenting sun above their heads the entire day and the unforgiving rope whip on their backs, the members end up living a hand to mouth existence on what can only be described as meager charity.